Why your prayer life isn’t growing and what to do about it.
Do you ever feel like you’re doing everything right when it comes to your prayer life and working to grow in your faith, but you’re just not seeing the results it seems like everyone else is getting? You wonder why your prayer life isn’t growing and you are not sure what to do about it.
It is so frustrating. Why is this happening?
It turns out you might be making one of these 3 mistakes:
- Mistake 1: Not asking God to help you to grow in your love for Him.
- Mistake 2: Not planning time for prayer every day. (Remember, five minutes is better than zero minutes.)
- Mistake 3: Not praying because your relationship with God is not what you think it should be.
You’re serious about growing closer to God. (I mean, why else would you be reading this post?) Yet, you feel stumped as to why you are not moving forward in your prayer life. I am going to break down these three mistakes (and throw in another one) and how you can counteract them.
Mistake 1: Not asking God to help you to grow in your love for Him.
It may seem strange to pray for help in your prayer life, but this is important. God wants us to call on Him for every need we have. Growing closer to Him and growing in your prayer life are very important things. He will help you. Ask Him for help.
If you are looking for inspiration or ideas about different ways to pray, the post How to “Pray About It” offers many different ways you can pray.
Reading books about prayer can be helpful and provide tips and insights you have never thought of before. You don’t need to read every book there is on prayer! Just one tip from one book can make a difference. Good Catholic Books to Read: Improve Your Prayer Life offers many ideas for you to consider.
Mistake 2: Not planning time for prayer every day.
Pray every day. Yes, every day. You do not need to pray for hours each day. You just need to pray every day.
If praying every day is a struggle for you, just pray for five minutes a day. Start there. Then add more time. Think of things you do each day that you could use for prayer time instead, like being online. Also, think of times you can pray when may be doing something else, like doing laundry, washing dishes, walking, or driving.
I cover more details and ideas about adding prayer to your everyday life in How to Grow in your Faith Even if you Think you are too Busy.
Mistake 3: Not praying because your relationship with God is not what you think it should be.
I would venture to say that most people think their relationship with God is not what they want it to be. You want to be closer to God and see the many ways you fail. But, is your ideal relationship with Him one that is realistic or have you set a bar so high that you do not even try to reach it because you think it is unattainable?
Think of your life right now. In your vocation as a wife and mother, you are taking care of your family. You are serving God as you serve your family. This is important to remember! You are fulfilling your vocation and this is one way you serve God.
God loves you so much! He died on the cross for you and for your salvation because He wants you to be in Heaven with Him. We were made for Heaven, not for Earth. Heaven is our eternal home.
We can get caught up in the world and how we fit in-or don’t fit in. But our worth is not in what others think about us, it is in what God thinks. He loves us and calls us to Him. We need to understand our worth as beloved children of God. Understanding this truth can take time and prayer, but it is so important!
Reading about the lives of the saints and books by saints can be very helpful in this regard. You can find some recommendations here: Good Catholic Books to Read: Reading About the Saints
Mistake 4: Comparing your faith life to what you think someone else’s prayer life is like.
Yep. The comparison game. Comparing yourself to others does you no favors. It is not good for you to do this. Can you be inspired by someone? Absolutely! But when we compare ourselves to others and think we are not good enough, we are really questioning God and His providence.
Does the person you are comparing yourself to have the exact same situation? Probably not-not the same situation, number of kids, amount of time, or home that you have. You cannot compare apples to oranges and be upset you are not an apple.
There is a sentence that brings this point home: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” (This statement is attributed to Theodore Roosevelt.)
When you compare yourself to others and then feel bad about yourself, you are not looking at God, but at something else. When you turn to Christ and look to Him, you are only focused on how you can be who He calls you to be and you don’t compare yourself and your faith to what you think the faith life of another is like.
We all make mistakes in our prayer life.
In addition to these 3 mistakes, I could probably name at least 196,703 other mistakes I have made in my prayer life. God does not want us to be discouraged or give up. Know why your prayer life isn’t growing and then make changes. That is the key: to persist in our prayer life even when we face obstacles or are unsure. God helps us. One day at a time.
Have you made any of these mistakes in your prayer life? Leave a comment and let me know.
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